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  • Writer's picture~Kimberly Oden

When We Keep Our Face Towards THE SON, All Shadows Fall Behind

Feelings are a fickle thing. At best they help us rejoice in the highest ways & at worst, they betray our deepest fears.

I read a quote yesterday that said, “I sat with anger long enough until she told me her real name was grief.”

I think you could change “grief” with just about anything. Anger seems like a blanket emotional fruit that cam stem from many roots.

To my surprise, I felt anger as I walked into my dad’s hospital room yesterday. There were lights & tubes & gadgets everywhere, & there, in the center of it all, was my dad. 

As I watched his chest go up & down with the aid of a respirator,I felt angry.

Angry that he’s in that state, angry that my God has the capacity to do something & seemingly hasn’t, & angry that I didn’t have enough faith to not feel sad. To be honest, I think I was angry that I felt angry. Is that possible?

Today as I read about the weight Moses feels over leading his people, I could identify with the sense of desperation. The situation seems so hopeless that Moses’s feelings betray the deep recesses of his heart when he cries,

“If this is how you intend to treat me, just go ahead and kill me. Do me a favor and spare me this misery!”😳

Even though my insides flinched in fear of God’s reply, He does something amazing. He loves Moses right where he’s at, giving him 70 elders to help lead & the promise of meat for the whining people.

Moses, still in his feels, reacts to God yet again with anger & unbelief. I wanted to judge, but God’s reply  stopped me in my tracks:

“Has my arm lost its power? Now you will see whether or not my word comes true!”

His words served as a correction & reminder to those little girl places in my heart that yelled, “Why & how & when, Lord?”

It’s not earth shattering, but it’s enough manna for today. My Lord’s arm is not too short to save.

We can process the what ifs & whys with The One Who has all the answers, even if they are smeared with emotions. He can handle them😉

Jesus, we turn to You today with the myriad of emotions inside. We know when we face The Son, that all shadows fall behind. May the Light of Your Presence go before us, fill us with peace & be our rear guard. 

NUMBERS 10:1-11:23

MARK 14:1-21

PSALM 51:1-19

PROVERBS 10:31-32


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